When Love Costs: Judah (Joseph’s Brother) Teaches Teen Girls to Love Sacrificially

Quick poll in your head:

Would you give up your favorite snack for a friend? Would you risk losing your spot in line for someone else? Would you take the blame for a sibling or friend—even if it got you in trouble?

Okay, don’t answer out loud, but… where are you leaning? Are you brave enough to say yes to one of those? Or are you quietly thinking, “Girl, I’m just trying to survive this week”? Same.

Here’s the thing: today we’re talking about a love that actually costs something—like, really costs. The kind of love that makes your heart beat faster because it’s scary, risky, and way outside your comfort zone. And Judah in Genesis 44? He’s about to school us on exactly how that looks in real life.

Hey, hey, hey! Welcome back to Season 2, where we are walking step by step through the life of Joseph. And hold up, I have some exciting news—there are two bonus drops this week, because your girl knows extra nuggets of gold make everything better. 

But today, this is part of my “Every Wednesday Joseph Series DROP! YOU ARE WELCOME. 

This week, we’re diving into Genesis 44, and you better believe it’s about courage, sacrifice, and seeing h-earts—yep, the kind of stuff that can change your life if you let it.

Okay, real talk… confession time. So sometimes, when life feels a little out of control, I cope in… let’s call it a highly specific, slightly ridiculous way.

Like, I’ll check my lip gloss twice, then again, just to make sure it’s actually on and not stuck to my water bottle. I’ll triple-check my mascara to make sure there aren’t any rogue clumps—because nothing ruins your vibe like spider lashes. I’ll check my earbuds, my Starbucks app, my phone charger… basically anything that I can control, I will control. 😂

And okay, full honesty: I even triple-check my bag for tampons or pads, like I’m going into battle. And I know some of you do the same thing. Maybe it’s your makeup, your hair, your shoes, or even making sure your playlist is downloaded. We’re all just tiny perfectionists trying to survive life’s chaos, and honestly? That’s totally normal.

Okay, now that we’ve exposed our tiny control freak moments 😅—let’s rewind for just a sec and catch up from last week’s episode.

Remember Genesis 43? We talked all about assumptions, speculation, and those wild “what-if” spirals that can completely hijack our peace. 

Joseph’s brothers were a masterclass in overthinking — they ruled themselves guilty before a single word was even spoken. They let fear write their story before truth ever had a chance to speak.

And honestly? We do that too. We assume a friend’s mad at us because she didn’t text back. We spiral when someone leaves us on delivered. We play out entire imaginary scenarios — and then stress over them like they actually happened. 😅

But Proverbs 3:5 reminds us, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding.” Translation? Don’t build your beliefs on assumptions. God’s perspective is always clearer than ours.

So, where Genesis 43 was about learning to silence the “what ifs,” Genesis 44 takes us deeper. This week isn’t about assuming love — it’s about proving it. Because real love? Always costs something. And Judah’s about to show us exactly what that looks like.

Now, if you have your Bibles snag them real quick, otherwise pop open your Bible app and turn to Genesis 44:18–34.

Let’s set the scene: Joseph is sitting in his palace, his brothers are standing there, and Judah steps forward. Imagine that moment—heart racing, palms sweaty, but choosing to do the right thing anyway.

Genesis 44, starting at verse 18:

18 Then Judah went up to him. He said, “Please, sir. Let me speak a word to you. Don’t be angry with me, even though you are equal to Pharaoh himself. 19 You asked us, ‘Do you have a father or a brother?’ 20 We answered, ‘We have an old father. A young son was born to him when he was old. His brother is dead. He’s the only one of his mother’s sons left. And his father loves him.’

21 “Then you said to us, ‘Bring him down to me. I want to see him for myself.’ 22 We said to you, ‘The boy can’t leave his father. If he does, his father will die.’ 23 But you told us, ‘Your youngest brother must come down here with you. If he doesn’t, you won’t see my face again.’

24 So we went back to my father. We told him what you had said.

25 “Then our father said, ‘Go back. Buy a little more food.’ 26 But we said, ‘We can’t go down. We’ll only go if our youngest brother goes there with us. We can’t even see the man’s face unless our youngest brother goes with us.’

27 “Your servant my father said to us, ‘You know that my wife had two sons by me. 28 One of them went away from me. And I said, “He must have been torn to pieces.” I haven’t seen him since. 29 What if you take this one from me too and he is harmed? Then you would cause me to die as a sad old man. I would go down into the grave full of pain and suffering.’

30 “So now, what will happen if the boy isn’t with us when I go back to my father? His life depends on the boy’s life. 31 When he sees that the boy isn’t with us, he’ll die. Because of us, he’ll go down into the grave as a sad old man. 32 I promised my father I would keep the boy safe. I said, ‘Father, I’ll bring him back to you. If I don’t, you can put the blame on me for the rest of my life.’

33 “Now then, please let me stay here. Let me be your slave in place of the boy. Let the boy return with his brothers. 34 How can I go back to my father if the boy isn’t with me? No! Don’t let me see the pain and suffering that would come to my father.”

Let me draw your attention to verses 32 and 33. Other versions read: “I myself will become his slave… But your servant will never see disaster fall on my father.”

Can you feel the tension?Joseph’s watching from the sidelines.Judah’s heart is pounding.And in this one wild moment—everything shifts.This isn’t just a Bible story. This is real courage, raw emotion, and the kind of faith that costs something.

So what can we pull out of Genesis 44, and how does it actually show up in your life right now?

First — real love takes guts. Judah could’ve stayed silent. Played it safe. Pretended it wasn’t his problem. But instead, he stepped up for Benjamin. He risked everything—his comfort, his pride, his freedom—to protect someone else.That’s what love looks like in action.

And I know, you’re probably not standing before an Egyptian ruler, but your everyday moments still matter just as much. Real love might look like standing up for a friend everyone’s gossiping about, even if it costs you popularity points. It might mean being the first to apologize after a fight, even though your pride is kicking and screaming “don’t do it.” Or maybe it’s being honest when it would’ve been way easier to hide the truth. That’s courage. That’s love that costs something.

And God’s actually training your heart in those small moments right now, so when life gets big—you’ll already know how to love bravely.(📖 Joshua 1:9; 1 Corinthians 16:13)

Second — sacrifice shows growth. Let’s be honest: Judah wasn’t exactly the hero type earlier in his story. He made mistakes. Big ones.

But here, we see something shift. He chooses someone else over himself. He chooses humility over ego. And that’s what spiritual growth looks like—it’s not about getting everything right all the time; it’s about responding differently when you could have gone back to your old ways.

Sometimes it’s choosing to pause instead of pop off in a text thread. Sometimes it’s letting your sister have the last word (ugh, I know). Sometimes it’s celebrating your friend’s win even when you secretly wish it was yours. That’s what growth looks like: small, quiet, intentional choices that change the shape of your heart. And when you start noticing that shift—it’s proof God’s growing something strong in you. (Philippians 2:3–4; Galatians 5:22–23)

And third — God sees the heart work. Joseph’s test wasn’t really about that missing silver cup.

It was about revealing what was real. And here’s the thing—God does that too. Not to embarrass us, but to bring out what He’s already planted inside us. He sees your effort when you’re trying to do the right thing even though no one notices.

He sees when you delete the text you really wanted to send. He sees when you choose forgiveness instead of payback.That’s the stuff heaven claps for. That’s the kind of heart He can build something amazing from. (1 Samuel 16:7; Hebrews 6:10)

And honestly? Judah’s moment here is like a sneak peek of what Jesus would do later—except Jesus didn’t just step in for one brother. He stepped in for all of us.John 15:13 says it best: “Greater love has no one than this—to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”That’s the kind of love that changes everything.

So, what does this actually look like for you this week? Because let’s be real — love sounds sweet in theory, but in practice? It’s often messy, inconvenient, and sometimes… it straight-up costs us.

Ask yourself this: Who in your life might need a kind of love that costs you something? And what would it look like to actually give it — even if it means losing comfort, pride, or your “I’m fine” mask?

Let’s play it out for a second.

👉 Scenario 1: The Friend Group Thing.

You’ve got that one friend who’s kind of drifting — maybe she’s the one who used to sit with you at lunch but now she’s the target of subtle whispers. You know speaking up for her could risk your spot in the group. But remember what Jesus said in John 15:13: “There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” You might not be literally laying down your life, but you are laying down comfort and popularity — and that’s real love in action.

👉 Scenario 2: The Scrolling Sacrifice.

It’s late. You’re tired. You’ve scrolled for hours. Then your mom walks in and asks if you’ll talk for a bit because she “misses you.” Cue the internal eye roll. Every part of you wants to say, “I’m exhausted.” But instead, you pause. You put down your phone. You give her presence over preference. That’s what Romans 12:10 looks like in real life: “Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.” Love sometimes means choosing connection when it’s easier to check out.

👉 Scenario 3: The Apology That Hurts.

You snapped at your little sister, said something you didn’t mean, and now she’s crying. Every ounce of pride in you wants to justify it. But the Holy Spirit nudges: “Go make it right.” That moment — where your ego takes a hit but your relationship heals — that’s Philippians 2:3-4 playing out: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.” Real love humbles itself first.

So this week, don’t just say you love people — show it in ways that actually cost something.The kind of love that requires something from you is the kind that transforms you.And remember: God never wastes costly love.

Every time you choose it, you reflect His.

Alright, friends — grab your coffee, your tea, your water, or even just a comfy spot on the floor, because we’re gonna do a quick heart check and pray together. Don’t worry, you don’t need fancy words — just bring your heart, and let’s invite God in.

God, You showed us through Judah that love isn’t lip service — it’s sacrifice. So this week, would You help us love like that? The kind of love that costs something. When we want to stay quiet — give us courage to speak up. When we want to protect our pride — help us choose humility. When we want comfort — teach us to choose compassion.

Remind us that real love looks like You.You stepped in, took our place, and gave everything.So when it feels inconvenient or uncomfortable, help us remember — You never wasted a single act of costly love.

Strengthen our hearts, sharpen our eyes to see who needs it, and make us brave enough to love beyond our limits this week. In Jesus’ name, amen. 💛

Alright, my brave hearts, here’s the deal: love isn’t always easy, and sometimes it’s gonna feel like a weird, uncomfortable stretch. But that’s exactly where the magic happens. Every little choice to step up, to speak out, to do the scary-but-right thing? That’s gold. That’s Judah-level courage, and yes… sprinkled with a little Jesus-style boldness.

So this week, I dare you to do something that costs a bit. Text the friend you’ve been avoiding, speak up when everyone else stays quiet, hug the sibling you’ve been rolling your eyes at. Watch what happens when love wins over comfort.

And don’t worry — you’re not in this alone. God’s got your back, front, sides, and even that chaotic middle where your stomach is doing cartwheels. He’s cheering, guiding, and celebrating your brave little wins.

So go crush it this week — love like it costs you something, laugh like it doesn’t, and watch God turn your brave chaos into something legendary!