When Best Friends Betray You: Joseph’s Pit, Friendship Drama & God’s Bigger Plan

Okay, so tell me if this has ever happened to you: You’ve got that one friend who swears up and down, “We’re literally sisters. Pinky promise. Forever.” And then… poof. Outta nowhere, she’s sitting at lunch with the “popular girls,” leaving you on delivered, and suddenly your name is nowhere on her Snap story. 

Like, ummm excuse me?? I thought we were soulmates. I thought you had my back. And now I’m out here feeling like the “before” picture in a makeover montage.

If that’s you — girl, Joseph totally gets it. His own brothers, the people who should’ve been in his corner, straight up turned on him. Like not just “I unfollowed you” betrayal — we’re talking “we’re selling you to strangers” betrayal. Yikes.

So today, let’s talk about how to deal when your “ride-or-die” takes the next exit, how God can actually use betrayal for your glow-up, and why your story is so not over.

Hey hey, besties! Welcome back to FR, Let’s Talk — the podcast where we spill tea on faith, friendships, and all the messy in-betweens. I’m your girl Kaase, basically your big sis with a mic, who’s survived allll the middle school drama so I can hopefully help you survive yours.

We’re in Season 2, and if you’ve been hanging out with us, you know we’re following Joseph’s story from the Bible. Last week we kicked things off with dreams that make you a target. And this week? Ohhh girl, buckle up — it’s betrayal season.

Not like when your mom says, “We’ll grab Starbucks later” and then drives past it (tragic, but not betrayal). I’m talking about when someone you trusted straight up swaps you out for a “better option.” That sting hits different.

So let’s grab our iced coffee, sit criss-cross on the floor like we’re at a sleepover, and get into it.

Now, before we get all heavy, let’s remember: this is a safe spot. You can be totally honest, totally real, and still know you’re loved — by me, by this community, and by God. Okay? Okay.

BUT FIRST… let’s lighten things up a bit… yep, it’s time for FUNNY CONFESSIONS BABES!

Again, if you’re new here, this is where I spill my weird little habits that somehow keep me sane, and girl, I want you to start thinking about yours too.

So, here’s a fun one for today’s episode: Whenever I have to spell the word “bananas,” I literally sing Gwen Stefani’s Hollaback Girl chorus — you know, “The BEEP is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S!” — out loud. No shame, no shame at all.

It’s ridiculous, but it works.

Like, why is that word so hard to spell?! Anyone else with me on this? Or maybe you can better relate to MISSISSIPPI? M-I-S-S-I-S-S-I-P-P-I?!

OKAY — now it’s your turn — what’s your go-to silly coping move or funny confession? Is it a song? A dance? A snack? I want to hear all about it.

DO NOT leave me hanging, babes — I need to know your funny confessions too. Drop ‘em in my DMs or hit me with a voice note, because I just KNOW y’all have some hilarious ones that will make me feel better about singing Gwen Stefani at random moments in my kitchen.

Alright, now that we’ve loosened up — let’s pivot a little. Because today’s story? Whew, it’s juicy. 

Like, Bible soap-opera-level juicy. 

We’re talking dreams, drama, and a whole lot of betrayal. Except before you freak out — no, not the “my mom grounded me so she’s clearly the villain” kind of drama. Nope. 

We’re talking the kind of betrayal that feels way closer to home for you: friends that were supposed to ride-or-die but dipped the second something shinier came along.

You know what I mean. The “we’re totally besties foreverrr” friend who suddenly forgets you exist when a new girl joins the squad. 

The one who promises to save you a seat at lunch and then — poof — she’s sitting with someone else. 

Or the one who swears she’s on your team but low-key talks about you behind your back. Yeah… it sucks. Big time.

And that’s exactly what Joseph felt. 

Except his version was next-level. His own brothers — the people who should’ve been his inner circle — were straight up jealous of him, plotted against him, and literally tossed him in a pit. And you know what? That’s how betrayal usually feels for us, too. 

Like being thrown into a pit you didn’t dig. Like the rug got yanked out from under you.

But here’s the thing, girl: Joseph’s story is not just about betrayal. It’s about what God can do through betrayal. And that’s where it connects with us — because even when people flip on you, God doesn’t. He’s steady. He’s got your back. Always.

Alright, deep breath, let’s shift gears. Because now it’s time for the part where we grab our Bibles — or if you’re a phone girlie, open that Bible app. And hey — quick plug — if you haven’t checked out the free FR, Let’s Talk phone screens on our website (www.frletstalk.com), go snag one. 

That way, every time you tap open your phone, your lock screen can literally remind you that you are a daughter of favor. Cute and powerful.

Okay, got your Bible? Today we’re in Genesis 37:12–24. Let’s read it together.

12 Now his brothers had gone to graze their father’s flocks near Shechem,13 and Israel said to Joseph, “As you know, your brothers are grazing the flocks near Shechem. Come, I am going to send you to them.”

“Very well,” he replied.

14 So he said to him, “Go and see if all is well with your brothers and with the flocks, and bring word back to me.” Then he sent him off from the Valley of Hebron.

When Joseph arrived at Shechem,15 a man found him wandering around in the fields and asked him, “What are you looking for?”

16 He replied, “I’m looking for my brothers. Can you tell me where they are grazing their flocks?”

17 “They have moved on from here,” the man answered. “I heard them say, ‘Let’s go to Dothan.’”So Joseph went after his brothers and found them near Dothan.

18 But they saw him in the distance, and before he reached them, they plotted to kill him.

19 “Here comes that dreamer!” they said to each other.20 “Come now, let’s kill him and throw him into one of these cisterns and say that a ferocious animal devoured him. Then we’ll see what comes of his dreams.”

21 When Reuben heard this, he tried to rescue him from their hands. “Let’s not take his life,” he said.

22 “Don’t shed any blood. Throw him into this cistern here in the wilderness, but don’t lay a hand on him.” Reuben said this to rescue him from them and take him back to his father.

23 So when Joseph came to his brothers, they stripped him of his robe—the ornate robe he was wearing—24 and they took him and threw him into the cistern. The cistern was empty; there was no water in it.

25 As they sat down to eat their meal, they looked up and saw a caravan of Ishmaelites coming from Gilead. Their camels were loaded with spices, balm and myrrh, and they were on their way to take them down to Egypt.

Now… whew. Let’s break this down.

Joseph’s brothers are out in Shechem doing the hard, sweaty work of tending the flocks — while Joseph? He’s sleeping in his own bed, rocking his floor-length coat with the extra long sleeves - two super strong signs this boy was not intended for any sort of WORKING, let alone labor in the field. Basically, Joseph got the supervisor role while his brothers were stuck with manual labor. You can imagine how that rubbed them raw.

Then Jacob, Joseph’s dad — bless his heart — sends him out on what is basically a low-key spy mission. “Go see if your brothers are behaving.” Like, what?! Dad is straight-up putting Joseph in the most awkward situation ever. Imagine your mom saying, “Honey, go check if your siblings are doing their chores and report back.” Yeah, you’re getting jumped.

And sure enough — Joseph goes. And from a distance, his brothers see him coming. And y’all… the vibe shifts. 

They’re not just annoyed. They are done. 

They look at him in that coat and go: “Here comes Dream Boy. Let’s end this.” 

And they don’t mean “tease him a little.” Nah. They literally start plotting murder.

Pause. 

Can we sit in that? 

The Bible says sin always starts in the heart. 

Their jealousy didn’t just make them bitter — it turned into rage, into this sick little plan to destroy him. That’s how it works for us too if we let envy just sit there and rot.

Now picture the moment. Joseph shows up, smiling, probably like “Hey guys!” and before he even knows what’s happening, they grab him. They rip the coat right off his body — that same coat that screamed favor, the one that reminded them daily that “Daddy loves him more.” They strip it away, almost like they’re stripping away his very identity.

And then? The pit. Not a little hole, not a time-out corner. 

A dark, lonely, terrifying pit. 

Can you see him? 

His body hitting the dirt, lungs tight, eyes adjusting to the darkness. And then it hits — the panic.

Now let’s get inside Joseph’s head. He’s probably thinking:

• “I thought my brothers liked me…”

• “I thought Dad loved me and this coat was just… normal.”

• “I thought sharing my dreams would be exciting, not dangerous…”

• “I thought if I followed instructions, everything would be fine…”

He’s screaming, begging: “Please! Don’t do this! I’ll stop with the dreams, I’ll be different, I’ll do whatever you want!” He’s clawing at the dirt walls, heart pounding out of his chest.

Meanwhile… what are his brothers doing? Just sitting a few feet away, pulling out their lunch. 

Literally tearing into bread and dates while their baby brother is screaming for his life in the background. 

Y’all, that’s cold. 

Like, cold cold. 

Can you imagine your own siblings just… eating Chick-fil-A while you’re trapped in a hole in the ground? No remorse. Just hunger.

And then — here comes the cruelest part. They haul him back up. 

Relief washes over him, maybe even tears streaming down his face. And he’s probably thinking:

• “I thought they couldn’t be serious…”

  
  

• “I thought maybe God would protect me right now…”

  
  

• “I thought being good, obedient, and honest meant safety…”

  
  

But no. The relief lasts for half a second before reality hits — they’re not saving him. 

They’re selling him. Like a piece of property. Like he’s nothing.

And here’s the kicker: Joseph has no clue that God’s plan is still unfolding. All he feels in this moment is fear, betrayal, humiliation. His coat is gone. His brothers’ love is gone. His dignity is gone. 

He’s exhausted, traumatized, completely undone. And yet — God’s word, God’s promise, God’s bigger story? Still at work, even here.

Because here’s what Joseph didn’t know: they weren’t just attacking his dream. 

They were actually trying to silence God’s dream. 

They were trying to stop a word God Himself had spoken. And girl, let me tell you — you cannot stop what God has spoken. His promises will come to pass. Period.

Now before we deviate too far from our original scripture, I want to point something out here. 

See, in this moment, we get this little glimpse of Joseph’s older brother, Reuben. And he’s a complicated guy. Because on one hand, when his brothers were plotting to straight-up kill Joseph, Reuben was like, ‘Wait, hold up. Let’s not go that far. Let’s just throw him in the pit instead.’ Which, sounds awful — but his secret plan was to come back later and rescue Joseph, sneak him home, and hopefully be the hero.

And honestly, this is such a picture of what so many of us do. Reuben didn’t boldly stand up and say, ‘This is wrong. We can’t treat our brother like this.’ He wanted to keep the peace with his brothers, not rock the boat, not be that person who ruins the vibe. So instead, he played both sides — keeping the approval of the group while also telling himself, ‘It’s okay, I’ll fix this later.’

It sounds like a noble plan, right? But here’s where it gets complicated. On the outside, Reuben was going along with his brothers — not rocking the boat, not ruffling any feathers.

But on the inside, he was trying to play rescuer. He was straddling both sides: part of the crowd, but also trying to be the hero.

And here’s something REALLY wild: this is the same Reuben who, just two chapters earlier in Genesis 35, had done something really awful — slept with his father’s concubine. Yikes. That’s a whole other story. But even so, Scripture doesn’t erase him from God’s plan. His life reminds us that you’re not forever defined by your worst mistake.

But here’s the heartbreaking part: later never came. Reuben’s plan failed. Because compromise always costs something. He wanted to be the rescuer and the people-pleaser at the same time, and it just didn’t work.

He lost the chance to actually protect Joseph because he was more worried about keeping the peace with people than doing the hard right thing.

And maybe that hits a little close to home. How many times do we try to quietly do the right thing without risking rejection? How often do we want to please God but also keep everyone around us happy? Reuben’s story warns us: you can’t live halfway in. Playing both sides often means losing the chance to do the very thing you wanted most. We think, ‘If I just go along now, I can make it right later.’ But later doesn’t always come. And like Reuben, we can end up losing the very thing we thought we could protect.

See, that’s the thing about trust—it’s fragile. And it’s not just something people give us, it’s something we either nurture or chip away at by how we live. I remember wanting my parents to trust me so badly, but the truth was, I hadn’t really earned it. So when they hesitated, questioned me, or double-checked things, my victim-mentality screamed betrayal!… when deep down, I knew I had built an atmosphere of distrust with my own choices.

And honestly, that kind of misplaced trust isn’t just about parents. It shows up in friendships too. I had this friend in high school who seemed perfect—she always said the right things, backed me up when I needed it, and reassured me whenever I complained about other friend drama. But then I’d find out that minutes later, she was validating the very girls who were causing the drama in the first place. What I thought was a safe, trustworthy friendship ended up proving untrustworthy.

That’s why we need to keep our discernment lenses on. We can’t just assume trust—we need God’s wisdom to guide us, not only in who we choose to trust, but also in how trustworthy we’re becoming. Because here’s the thing: you play a role too. Your patterns of honesty, consistency, and character will either create an atmosphere of trust… or the opposite. And girl, people can feel that.

Now, before I share my own story, just a quick heads-up: the story I’m about to tell touches on a moment of “family letdown" in my life, but let me be super clear — I’m not saying families are bad or that we should expect them to turn on us. 

In this situation, I was older, out of the house, back from college, and honestly, as I said before, my own choices leading up to that moment made it hard for my parents to fully trust me. The point here isn’t blame — it’s about recognizing how we can create walls that make trust tricky. 

And, in this season of life, betrayal usually shows up for your guys, from friends, the ones we think are ride-or-die, who ghost us, switch sides, or leave us hanging. 

My story is just a backdrop for what it feels like to be doubted or hurt, so you can better understand the “I thought” moments that Joseph went through.

So let’s just imagine for a moment all the “I thought” doubts swirling through Joseph’s mind the moment they are lowering him into this deep, dark pit: I thought my family loved me. I thought they had my back. I thought they respected me… I mean, I didn’t even ask for this favoritism—my dad just put me here! Isn’t this heart wrenching? But, I’m guessing so many of you can relate, am I right? 

Here’s the tea: growing up, I wasn’t exactly the queen of honesty. Not proud of it then, and still not proud of it now. A lot of it came from feeling like people thought they had a right to know every little detail of my life. To protect myself, I’d embellish or cover things up just to keep some parts of my world private. Yep, it’s complicated. And yeah, that created a little cloud of doubt and hesitation around me.

Which made this one moment extra rough. On New Year’s Eve, I went out with a guy friend. I hadn’t been drinking — like, seriously zero. I really wanted my parents to believe me. But because of everything that had come before, they questioned me. And honestly? Who could blame them? I’d given them reasons to second-guess me.

It felt like betrayal, sure. But here’s the part I want you to really hear: sometimes, people will draw conclusions about you, make assumptions, or misread the story. After all, we all have our own pair of “glasses,” and how someone sees you—or your story—always comes from the lens they’re wearing that day.

If their glasses are a little scratched from past hurts, old disappointments, previous drama, or even misperceptions, every single thing you do might get filtered through that wounded lens.

And that’s where friendship hurt shows up—friends ghosting, switching sides, leaving you on read, or just… disappearing altogether. That doesn’t make it fair, but it does make sense.

So yeah, Joseph’s “I thought” moments? Totally relatable. And you? You’ll see this too—sometimes people around you act from their own wounds, not from the real, sparkling,

fabulous truth about you. 

And here’s the kicker: that’s not a reflection of your value—it’s a reflection of their lens.

So next time you feel doubted, brushed off, or just plain betrayed by a friend, remember: sometimes, it’s all about the glasses they’re wearing. 

And you? You keep rocking your own story, with truth, grace, and a little sass along the way. 

Okay babes, so now that we’ve walked through Joseph’s “I thought” tornado of emotions and my little mini story of betrayal, let’s make this real for you. Because let’s be honest—this isn’t just ancient history, it’s your life too.

Picture this: you’ve got friends you trusted completely—the ones who used to text you memes at 11 p.m., share your French fries with a frosty, or be your partner-in-crime at lunch. And then… surprise! They ghost, switch sides, or bail when you really needed them. Ugh. Total betrayal moment.

Here’s the thing: Joseph’s brothers tried to crush his dreams and literally left him in a pit. Now, your “pit” might look different—maybe it’s a rumor, a friend who flaked on you, or someone who just didn’t have your back when you needed it the most. 

But Joseph didn’t stay stuck, and neither do you. God’s plan was already moving behind the scenes.

So what’s the takeaway? Sometimes people’s drama, jealousy, or assumptions will try to define your story—but it doesn’t get the final say. 

You do. 

You keep your sparkle, your confidence, and your God-given purpose, even when someone’s “skewed glasses” make them misread you. 

Here’s how you can live that out in your day-to-day:

1. Trust your vibe – Not everyone will understand you, and that’s fine. Your job isn’t to fix their story—it’s to live yours boldly.

   
   

2. Check your lenses too – Just like others can see you through a distorted lens, you might misread them sometimes. Pause, breathe, and separate assumptions from truth.

   
   

3. Keep dreaming – Joseph’s dreams didn’t get canceled because of betrayal, and neither should yours. God’s plans for you are bigger than any friendship drama.

   
   

Alright loves, before we pray, let’s take a sec to get real with our hearts. This is your moment to pause, notice what’s been stirring inside you, and invite God in. Think about these three things as you settle in:

• A time someone hurt you or didn’t understand you—what feelings pop up when you remember it?

  
  

• A dream or desire you’ve had that others didn’t get—how does God want to walk with you through it?

  
  

• One way you’ve tried to fit in or people-please instead of trusting God’s plan for you—what would it look like to let that go?

  
  

Got that in your heart? Perfect. Let’s lean in and speak to God together…we’re going to lock this in with a little sparkle—aka our prophetic prayer. Take a comfy seat, close your eyes if you want, and let’s invite God into this moment:

God, thank You for always seeing us, even when others misread our story. Thank You for holding our hearts when betrayal or doubt tries to shake us. Lord, we ask that You guide our friendships, help us choose wisely, and protect our hearts from the people who aren’t meant to carry them.

Help us see past the “skewed glasses” of others and not let misperceptions steal our joy or purpose. Give us courage to dream like Joseph, knowing Your plan is unfolding even in the mess, even when we feel unseen.

Lord, help our hearts stay soft, kind, and full of grace—even when friends disappoint, hurt, or leave us hanging. Let us hold onto Your truth, that we are loved beyond measure, chosen for a purpose, and never alone.

In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Alright, wild hearts, let’s bring it full circle! Today we felt Joseph’s “I thought” vibes, peeked into the messy truth of assumptions and jealousy, and connected it to our own friendships and choices. Bottom line? God’s got the big picture—even when people’s perspectives are totally skewed or others betray you. 

For your week: protect your joy, cling to your dreams, and remember that God’s got this story on lock. 

And guess what? Next week we’re going deep—how God’s sovereignty reigns even when people’s schemes seem to take over. 

Drama, lessons, and major faith vibes incoming!