EPISODE 6: Staying True to You + God’s Righteous Anger Explained

I wish that I had really known Jesus more intimately at 10 or 11 years old.

Like really knew Him.

I wish I had known more than Sunday school stories and the books of the New Testament. 

Like knew Him as the Creator of the Universe who was absolutely, head over heels crazy about me. Because even knowing that now, Iʼve had 40-years of hurt, rejection, pain, disappointment and confusion that have all contributed to my hardened heart. That hurt has compounded over a lifetime leaving me cynical and bitter in so many ways. 

You see, so much of why I am doing this podcast is because I look back and see such a gap in my own life. A gap where I wish someone wouldʼve stepped in for me, in this season of my life.

Taken my hand, given it a little squeeze and smiled saying, “Hey, this way, come with me. I have you. God is near.” 

If I am being honest, itʼs actually really hard to recall memories from this season of my life.The middle school and high school years. After years of counseling I finally realized that this is an actual “thing."

A thing that our brain does to block out all the hurt. I learned that our brains sometimes try to protect us from painful memories. When we go through tough times, like being hurt or rejected, our mind creates a sort of shield to help us not feel the full weight of the pain. It’s like, when something hurts, we build walls around ourselves so that it won’t hurt as much next time.

Even if we face more hurt in the future, it doesn’t feel as bad, because we’ve already learned how to protect ourselves better.

So, the reason I don’t remember much from that time is that I built those walls to protect myself from all the hurt I went through. I had to deal with a lot of rejection growing up, and the more I went through, the better I got at guarding myself.

That’s why it’s hard to look back and remember everything—it’s like my brain was trying to protect me from all the pain.

And after years of learning to protect myself, I became pretty stinking closed off to the outside world. 

I think I have touched on my upbringing a little bit in previous episodes, but growing up in a small town and having natural athletic talent made me a target for bullying. Which is really sad to say, but it was absolutely true.

And again, while the memories arenʼt vivid, what I can tell you is that by the time I left for college, I had become so guarded, that I didnʼt even care if I had friends. I had learned to fly solo through a lot of my life, learning to never rely on anyone for anything. 

Again, looking back, what I needed in that season of life, more than anything else, was someone to take my hold of my hand and point me directly to Jesus. 

So I find it the least that I can do, to step into that role for you.

To encourage you, support you, cheer you on.

Remind you that you are seen and not overlooked.

And point you to Godʼs word for truth about who you are and why He created you.

Even as I struggle myself a lot of days, I find it my responsibility to point you back to Him.

I look back and realize that bullying and exclusion played out in a lot of different ways in my life during these middle school years, but, two instances in particular stand out me more than the others.

And I guess I share them with you today to remind you that we cannot hand our identity over to our peers. There is only one person on all the earth that has the privilege and honor of stepping into that role-and that is God himself. 

I also tell you this to remind you that your mom, who many of you probably find to be SO annoying right now. Your mom, who is irritating and out to ruin all the fun. That mom, who speaks truth into your life even when it hurts or isnʼt fun. That mom who cheers you on, believes in you, supports you and loves you, no matter what, will ALWAYS have your back.

And even though she seems like the fun police right now, she will always be in your corner. There is nothing you could do to change that. So never forget it.

Friend, let this be your reminder today that you can approach this season of your life differently than I did. You donʼt have to hand that power over to your peers, or to culture or to the boy you like. 

You donʼt have to bend on your convictions or feel peer pressured to act or look at certain way. No, Iʼm sure itʼs not easy. I know itʼs not easy. But I wasnʼt strong enough to stand on my own. I didnʼt lean into my parentsʼ advice in this season of my life.

I thought I knew best, and caved on all the things that I cared so deeply about. And became someone who I didn’t even recognize. But you donʼt have to make those same mistakes. 

As someone who has been there before you, take it from me, itʼs not worth it. One day you will look back and be glad that you chose to stand strong in your convictions. To say no to peer pressure. To be the salt and light. Even if it is counter-cultural, deviant or even embarrassing.

One of the most destructive things about my upbringing was the power of gossip. Let me unpack that for you a little bit because this is probably foreign to most of you. 

You see, the internet didnʼt exist back then and certainly not social media where girls could say anything and then run and hide behind a screen.

So instead of being mean and then hiding, girls were just mean. To your face. Or behind your back. And the impact that it had on your life was far deeper reaching than anyone couldʼve expected.

So back then, instead of social media or text messaging, girls would buy these notebooks or journals. And theyʼd pass these journals back and forth between their groups of friends.

So maybe Iʼd have a journal with Lindsay and Mandy, but then Iʼd also have a journal with another group of friends, Sarah and Jane and Lucy. And weʼd each spend time writing things in these journals and then secretively-and in an attention seeking way-pass them from one friend in the group to another. 

As you can imagine, just the nature of “who wanted to have a journal with you” was reason enough to feel “not good enough!”

Like maybe I did make the cut. To have a journal with the cool girls - Kylie and Megan. But then you take it one step further and layer on top of it the power of words that were written down for all to see. 

And usually the words inside these journals were mean and harsh. Holding nothing back. Gossipy and untrue a lot of the time. 

Well, this one time in particular, and whether it was on purpose or not, I will never know, but a journal that 3 other girls had between themselves somehow found its way to my lap during social studies.

I didnʼt realize it wasnʼt intended for me, so I opened the journal at lunch and started reading. Within a matter of minutes, I found my name all over the pages.

Lies, gossip, hurtful words.

Mean, nasty, unbelievable things they were saying about me. Things about how hard I tried to fit in and how this boy I liked would never like me because my teeth were all messed up and I looked like I was 8 years old with my jacked up braces. 

I wish I could take you back to this day at the lunch table. You guys, my heart fell down to my feet. I could hardly move. Paralyzed by their words, hurt and confused, I ran back to the classroom and set the journal on the desk of the person who it actually belonged to. 

The worst part was as soon was I returned, 2 of the 3 girls were bantering with me, whispering things back and forth WITH me as if I was apart of their circle. But I knew the truth, I knew I wasnʼt. And they had no clue what I had just read.

Not long thereafter I was recovering from a weekend sleepover that we had had at my house. That weekend, a few of the girls who spent the night decided to sneak out to go see some boys they were crushing on.

At the time my bedroom was in the basement, and ultimately sneaking out was pretty easy to do if that was your thing. It wasnʼt mine, but I ultimately knew I couldnʼt stop them.

Unfortunately, on their way back into my house, they woke my parents and the cat was out of the bag. The next morning, my parents addressed it with their parents, and of course they got in epic trouble. Which I knew wouldnʼt fare well for me.

Of course, their poor choice became my fault. 

As I went to school that Monday, I remember feeling sooooo sick to my stomach. I had no idea what I would be met with. I knew they had gotten caught, and my parents had told their parents. I was sure they hated me now. And, not long after, I found out just how much they hated me.

After 2nd period, I went to my locker, opened it, and a letter fell out. I picked it up carefully, and it was a long, handwritten note that completely ripped me apart.

It said I was ugly and disgusting, that no one liked me or my mom, and that we were embarrassing and hated by everyone.

As I read more, tears filled my eyes. I couldn’t even understand how someone could hate me so much that they would write those awful things. It hurt more than I could even explain.

If I am being completely honest, I donʼt even remember what happened next. I donʼt know if I went to the office and pretended to be sick or if I acted as though I never got the letter, but I can tell you one thing, that memory has never left me.

And while a lot of the details in between the lines feel blurry,  the hurt itself is deeply embedded into my memory bank. As I mentioned before, 40-years of hurt compounded. All these hurts that started to pile up making me a hard-hearted, cynical person.

Again, why do I tell you all these sad stories? 

I know I mentioned a few reasons above, reminding you that your mom, no matter what, always has your back. While I don’t remember the fallout of the letter in my locker, I do remember most clearly that my mom HAD MY BACK. And she was there for me when I needed her most. 

But I also tell you because I want you to know that youʼre not alone. 

This is a really freaking hard season of life. 

And if there is one thing I can do to help you weather this storm, its point you to Jesus.

You know, had I been closer to Jesus in that moment, I can imagine that I wouldʼve handled things much differently.

And even though my parents loved the Lord, I too, think they were unsure how to handle such mean and hateful injustices. 

What I do know is this. If your mom, your family and even some of your friends have your back in these epically hurtful moments, the creator of the universe, who hand-picked every single detail about your existence, has your back EVEN more.

He is waiting for you to come to him, fall flat on your floor, brokenhearted, in tears. Full transparency. 

Because Godʼs word says, His grace is sufficient and his power is made perfect in your weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9). Our weakness is met with His greatness. And if there is one thing I know about God, he is a God of justice.

And even though we canʼt make sense of this hatred, God will wipe away every tear and in Isaiah 61:8, He promises to right every wrong.

This verse emphasizes God's love for justice and his abhorrence of injustice, promising to restore what has been taken. And in Romans 12:9 God assures us that those wrongs are his to avenge.

It reads, ”Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: 'It is mine to avenge; I will repay,' says the Lord."

Sis, this season of life is hard. My door is always open. 

I also want to leave you with this today. Perspective. Another lens to consider putting on in this season of your life.

I know right now it feels like the world is crashing down on you sometimes. The drama with friends, the stress of school, the constant worries about what’s next—it can all feel huge.

And when you're in the middle of it, it’s hard to see past the now. You might feel like this is it, like it’s all there is, and you can’t imagine life ever being different.

But I need you to take a deep breath and hear this: this moment is just a tiny sliver of the whole picture of your life.

Like Iʼm 40. And now I look back at that season of my life, from say 10-20 years old - that was 10, short years. Iʼve lived 30 other years outside of those 10 horrible years. You guys, 30 years compared to 10.

This is a tiny, tiny piece of the picture. 

I wish I could drive over to your house right now and give you a huge hug and tell you: these tween and teen years are a small, tiny fraction of your life.

Seriously, a blip on the radar. I know it feels like everything is riding on today—every friendship, every test, every moment of angst—but trust me, this is not your forever.

In Psalm 90:12, it says, "Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom."

These years are going to teach you so much, but they are just one chapter of a much bigger story. If you can hold onto that perspective, it might just lighten the load you're carrying.

Imagine this: in the grand scheme of your entire life, these few years will be behind you before you know it. And yet, the choices you make in these years can carry weight, which is why it’s so important to approach them with care.

Don’t let the drama or the pressure make you feel like you need to make life-altering decisions right now. Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight." 

Girl, God has a bigger plan for you than this moment of struggle. If you can take a step back, breathe, and trust Him, He’ll guide you through this season and show you how to handle the drama and challenges with grace.

I want you to remember that these years—while important—aren’t the whole story. You have your whole life ahead of you, and God is with you through it all.

You’ve got so much more to experience, and so many incredible things waiting for you. Stay strong, stay true to yourself, and trust that this moment, too, shall pass. The best is yet to come!

OK, now because I ranted for SO long already, weʼre only going to tackle 1 really big question today. And Itʼs a BIG ONE. This one comes from a super bright friend of mine, Elsie. She asks: Does God ever get mad, frustrated or impatient with us? 

Alright, let’s get real, because this is an important question, and I’m not going to sugarcoat it.The truth is—YES, He does. I want to start with one scripture right out of the gate to set the tone for this larger conversation. 

If you have your bibles, turn with me to Exodus. Once youʼre there, navigate with me to the big number 34. Lets first start by reading versus 6-7 but then I want to give you some context. 

Exodus 34:6-7 (NIV):

"And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, 'The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion, and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation.’"

Now, I want to focus your attention on one simple sentence: “SLOW TO ANGER.”

What does this tell us? If God is slow to anger, it clearly shows that He does get angry. Period. So, there’s your answer to a big, complicated question—yes, God does experience anger. Now let me give you some context to help you better understand the full picture of God's character.

I know, that might not be what you expected to hear. But here’s the deal: God isn’t some soft, always-happy, no-judgment, “everything’s fine” kind of figure. 

The most important takeaway about WHO God is can be summarized in these 3 words. 

God is holy.

God is righteous.

And, God is just.

And yes, He does get frustrated with us when we mess up, when we ignore His wisdom, or when we straight-up reject Him.

Now, in Exodus 34, Moses has just come down from Mount Sinai the second time after the Israelites had sinned by worshiping the golden calf (Exodus 32). In anger, Moses had broken the first set of tablets containing the Ten Commandments. Now, after the people repent, Moses goes back up the mountain to receive a new set of tablets from God.

As Moses is on the mountain, God reveals Himself to him in a powerful way, explaining His name and His nature. This is where we get the verses Exodus 34:6-7, where God describes Himself as "compassionate," "gracious," "slow to anger," and "abounding in love."

The context is profoundly significant because this moment happens right after Israel’s failure, after they had JUST turned away from God, disobeyed Him, and caused His anger.

Yet, despite their sin, God reveals Himself as merciful and forgiving.

I want to visit a few “Key Themes” in These Verses:

1. God's Compassion and Grace: God begins by describing Himself as compassionate and gracious. Despite the fact that the Israelites had just turned to idolatry, He is still willing to show them mercy. This shows that God’s character is marked by love and grace, not just judgment. God’s compassion means He feels deeply for His people, especially when they suffer or fail.

   
   

2. Slow to Anger: God describes Himself as slow to anger, which emphasizes His patience. While God is holy and righteous, He does not act in anger quickly. He allows time for repentance and change of heart, showing immense restraint in the face of human failure. This is a crucial aspect of God’s character that’s demonstrated throughout the Bible, and a point we just cannot miss in this conversation. 

   
   

3. Abounding in Love and Faithfulness: God’s love is abundant and faithful. He doesn't just have love—He has a limitless supply of love. His love is not temporary or fleeting; it is steadfast and enduring. His faithfulness ensures that He keeps His promises to His people, even when they fail.

   
   

4. Forgiving Sin: God is forgiving and merciful. He forgives wickedness, rebellion, and sin, despite the fact that the people of Israel had just committed serious sins by worshiping the golden calf. God offers forgiveness even when they don’t deserve it, and He does so because of His great mercy.

   
   

5. Justice: While God is merciful and forgiving, He also does not leave the guilty unpunished. God’s justice is part of His holy nature. He does not simply overlook sin. He will punish sin, and in this context, it’s mentioned that the consequences of sin affect generations (up to the third and fourth generations). This isn’t about punishing everyone for someone else’s mistakes, but it shows how sin can affect not just the person who sins, but also their family and others around them.

   
   

6. Understanding the Balance of Mercy and Justice: Exodus 34:6-7 reveals both mercy and justice. It shows that even though God is compassionate, He doesn’t ignore sin. The "punishment to the third and fourth generation" doesn’t mean that God punishes innocent children for their parents’ sin, but rather that the consequences of sin ripple out and impact future generations. However, His love and mercy, shown to thousands, outweigh the consequences of sin.

The Bible often shows us that God’s anger and judgment are never His first choice. His heart is always to forgive and restore. But sin must be dealt with because God is holy is JUSTICE REQUIRES IT.

Still, He is always willing to forgive those who turn back to Him in repentance.

Why This Passage Is Important

And of all the scripture that I couldʼve picked, why did I pick this one? Well this isnʼt the only scripture I am going to tie in to Godʼs anger, but I think it paints a very simple answer to a very complicated question. If God is slow to anger, then it is abundantly clear that he does in fact, anger. Period. 

In the story of the Israelites, they had just failed miserably. But God reminds Moses—and through Moses, all of Israel—of who He is: a God of mercy, grace, and forgiveness. 

This is a reminder that no matter how far you’ve fallen, God’s character is one that desires to restore and forgive, but that doesn’t mean He ignores the effects of sin.

This passage offers hope, showing that God is not just a God of judgment, but a God of abundant love who will always be faithful to His people, even when they mess up.

Now, all over the bible we see moments where God expresses His anger. And so many of those moments were because of His Chosen People - the Israelites. Man, did they drive God crazy! 

Honestly, they were constantly turning away from Him, complaining, and grumbling. They’d see God perform miracle after miracle, and then, like two seconds later, they’d be worshiping a golden calf or saying they were better off back in Egypt. God got so mad at them.

As I mentioned earlier, In Exodus 32:9-10, God says to Moses, "I have seen these people, and they are a stiff-necked people. Now leave me alone so that my anger may burn against them and that I may destroy them."

Whoa. 

That's some serious anger right there. But guess what? He still didn’t wipe them out—because God’s anger is always righteous and it always comes with a purpose. His goal isn’t to destroy us, but to lead us to repentance, to help us understand how much we need Him.

And then there’s Jesus, the Son of God, who also got frustrated. He wasn’t always that gentle, “peace and love” guy we often picture. If youʼre familiar, in Mark 3:5, it says, “He looked around at them in anger and deeply distressed at their stubborn hearts…”

This was when people were criticizing Jesus for healing on the Sabbath. He was like, Are you kidding me? It’s good to do good things, even on the Sabbath. Jesus got mad at the way people were ignoring what really mattered. He didn’t just sit there quietly. He spoke up. He called out people’s hypocrisy, their selfishness, and their lack of faith. Tactfully. 

Now, I want to mention, I am addressing the topic of Godʼs anger, by and large, but I also want to bring to light that there are all sorts of anger that we find demonstrated throughout scripture. Really quickly, here are 5 different types of anger that we see on full display in the Bible and a brief summary of each. 

1. Righteous Anger

• What it is: This is anger that is rooted in God's holiness, justice, and righteousness. It occurs when God sees something that violates His law, His will, or His holiness. It’s about righting wrongs and defending what is true.

• Example: Jesus flipping over the tables in the temple (Matthew 21:12-13) is a perfect example of righteous anger—God’s anger is directed at the people who turned a place of worship into a marketplace, dishonoring God.

  
  

2. Empathetic Anger

• What it is: This is anger that comes from God’s deep love and care for His people. It's anger that flows out of grief or sorrow for the pain people are causing themselves. It's not just about the offense against Him, but also about the harm that sin causes to the people He loves.

• Example: In Exodus 32:9-14, after the Israelites made the golden calf, God was ready to destroy them. But Moses intercedes, reminding God of His covenant, and God relents. This anger comes from a deep concern for the people’s well-being, as their sin will bring destruction to them.

  
  

3. Indignant Anger

• What it is: Indignant anger is a type of righteous anger, but it’s more personal. It happens when God’s character is insulted or mocked. It's the kind of anger God feels when people misrepresent Him or misuse His name.

• Example: In Numbers 20:10-12, when Moses and Aaron struck the rock to get water instead of speaking to it as God commanded, God’s anger was kindled because they misrepresented Him to the people. This misrepresentation of God’s instructions led to consequences.

  
  

4. Judgmental Anger

• What it is: Judgmental anger is a type of anger God expresses when He responds to sin with divine justice. It’s often connected to punishment, as God’s holy justice demands that sin be dealt with. This kind of anger leads to judgment upon those who refuse to repent.

• Example: In Genesis 19, God destroys the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah because of their extreme wickedness. His anger is a direct response to their unrepentant sin and rebellion.

  
  

5. Disciplinary Anger

• What it is: This anger comes from God’s desire to correct and discipline His people. It’s not aimed at destroying them but at bringing them back into alignment with His will. God’s anger in these situations is meant to guide His people back to righteousness, often in the form of consequences or chastisement.

• Example: In Hebrews 12:5-11, the writer talks about how God disciplines those He loves, like a father disciplines his child. God's anger here is more like tough love—it’s corrective, not destructive.

Each of these types of anger highlights a different aspect of God's character: His holiness, His love, His justice, and His desire to restore His people. God's anger is always just and purposeful, never reckless or uncontrolled. Understanding these different types of anger helps us see how God uses anger to bring about His will and His glory while caring deeply for His people.

So I think the most important thing to recognize here is that Godʼs anger is not SIMPLE. Itʼs multi-faceted, just like HE IS. And Godʼs anger is not like ours. Not at all. 

When we get mad, we often act out of selfishness or hurt feelings. 

But God’s anger is always just. 

It’s always with a purpose—to correct us, to remind us who He is, and to lead us to what’s better. In Hebrews 12:6, it says, "The Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son." 

God’s frustration is often a form of discipline, like a parent telling you “No” because they know it’s for your own good.

Now, you might be thinking, “But why would God get mad at ME? I’m just trying to do my best!” And that’s the thing—God isn’t mad at you personally. Again, I think this goes back to Godʼs anger is different than ours.

He’s mad at sin, at how we often choose the wrong path. He’s frustrated when we forget that He’s given us everything we need to make the right choices. But instead of throwing us away or giving up on us, He keeps calling us back. 

He’s patient, yes, but He also expects us to take responsibility for our actions.

And here's a kicker—God doesn’t just leave us hanging when we mess up. He always makes a way for us to come back to Him. Psalm 103:8 says, "The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love." Isnʼt that interesting. This passage is almost identical to the passage we found in Exodus 34. And when something is repeated in the Bible, it must be pretty dang important! 

So the simplified version, with a cherry on top. And I am sorry I keep repeating myself, but I just want to be sure that we leave todayʼs episode, biblically on the right path. Understanding Godʼs anger is really stinking important. 

God is the embodiment of perfect holiness. When He’s angry over sin, it's always because sin goes against His holy nature. His righteous anger defends His honor and His justice.

But He also feels empathy for us in our brokenness, and His anger toward sin is intertwined with His desire to see us restored, not destroyed.

His anger is never selfish or unrighteous—it’s always for His glory, for justice, and for our ultimate good. His anger is a reflection of His perfect, holy character.

He hates sin because it dishonors Him and harms His creation. But even in His anger, He shows mercy, compassion, and grace, because His ultimate desire is for us to be reconciled to Him.

So, when you experience anger, remember that it’s okay to feel anger at injustice and sin, but let it always be filtered through the lens of God’s perfect holiness and love.

Now, I want you to think about this—when you mess up, how do you respond? 

Do you get defensive? 

Or do you take a step back and learn from it? 

It's your move, girl. 

Dig into this stuff, ask questions, and keep exploring your faith. 

Only you can truly own your faith.