Sunkissed + Sanctified | Memo 06 Outgrow and Don't Apologize!

HI HI HI! Okay, I’m just going to say the thing that literally no one wants to admit out loud because it feels "mean." Have you ever been sitting with your "day ones"—the group you’ve known since middle school—and suddenly, you feel like you’re speaking a completely different language? Like, they’re talking about the same old drama, the same old "situationships," the same old party plans, and for the first time in your life, you’re just… over it?

And then the guilt hits you like a truck. You think, "Am I being fake? Am I acting like I’m better than them? Is there something wrong with me for not wanting to do this anymore?" Welcome back. Today we are going deep on The Courage to Outgrow People. This is probably the hardest part of the "sanctified" life, but babes, it is the most iconic sign that God is actually doing a new thing in you.

The Download 

Let’s talk about the "Download." Growth is uncomfortable. Think about when you were a kid and you got "growing pains" in your legs—it hurt! Spiritual growth is exactly the same. Sometimes, God starts changing your "appetite." You start wanting more out of your summer than just "fitting in." You start wanting to actually live for Him, to have peace, to be pure, to have conversations that actually have a purpose.

And when that happens, the people who aren't growing at the same pace as you are going to feel like "friction." I remember a summer where I realized my "main" group of friends was actually my biggest distraction. I loved them—honestly, I still do—but I realized that every time I was with them, I was a "diluted" version of myself. I was laughing at jokes that weren't funny. I was going places I didn't want to go just to be "chill." I was staying "small" so they wouldn't feel uncomfortable with how much I was changing.

But listen: You cannot reach your full potential while staying tethered to people who are happy being stagnant. Outgrowing people isn't an act of hate; it’s an act of obedience to the woman God is building. It takes massive courage to say, "I love you, but I can't stay here with you." It’s lonely at first, I know. It’s scary to think you might not have a "squad" for a minute. But I’d rather be alone and walking with God than in a crowd and losing my soul.

The Truth Check

The Truth Check today is a heavy hitter, and we need to look it right in the eye. 1 Corinthians 15:33 says: “Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character.”

I love that it starts with "Do not be misled." Why? Because we love to lie to ourselves! we tell ourselves, "I’ll be the one to change them! I’m strong enough to stay holy while they’re doing their thing." But the Bible is very clear—company corrupts. It’s a slow fade. It’s one joke you shouldn't laugh at, one lie you tell your parents to stay "loyal" to the group, one outfit that doesn't feel like "you" but everyone else is wearing it. Before you know it, the girl God is trying to grow in you is buried under the expectations of people who don't even know the real you. Bad company doesn't just "influence" you—it corrupts the core of who you are.

The Summer Move 

So here is your Summer Move. I want you to look at your "Top 3" people. Ask yourself: "Are they pulling me toward my future, or are they keeping me anchored in my past?" If you feel like you’ve outgrown a situation, your challenge this week is to Stop Forcing the Vibe. 

You don't have to have a big "breakup" talk. Just stop being the one to initiate the shallow drama. Stop being the one who makes sure everyone else is "okay" at the expense of your own walk with God. Lean into the quiet. Spend more time with the "one" friend who actually encourages your faith. When you make room by letting go of the old, God will bring "Kingdom Friends" into your life who actually speak your new language.